November 23rd, 2001


mood swings

Today wasn't a very happy day for me.

Sarah asked me to come online at lunch today. I logged on around noon, and she came on a couple of minutes afterwards. She got my package today, which was quicker than we had thought, so that was good (I sent her French Lessons, three mix tapes, some pictures of me, money, and a letter). Then I asked her what was so difficult about today, since she hadn't mentioned anything to me. I know it is the day before her birthday, but that was all. She answered the question with one sentence, then said a friend was there, and she had to go to lunch. Ugh. It was very frustrating. I logged off, and then went back to bed for a couple of hours before work.

I called Charlie from work, and left a message asking him what his plans were for tomorrow. While he was returning the call, my ex walked in the door! Needless to say, I informed him and then hung up. She seemed a bit dismayed that I reacted that abruptly with him. I told my ex that even though I am not a part of her life anymore, she is still important to me. So we chatted for a while, but nothing worthwhile came out of it. She claims that she didn't reveive the last email I sent to her in early September, shortly after she left for college. I told her about Sarah, and some of the similarities I see in my old and new relationships. She seemed happy that I had someone new, and informed me that she was also dating.

After all of this, I was drained emotionally. I talked to Charlie again later that night, and he asked if she had apologized for her silence or even brought it up. Nope.

So, tomorrow I will buy a DVD player for myself. I deserve a present. I need a vacation, too, but that will have to wait.

"The people in life, and the events in life do not make us the way we are, but reveal the way we are." Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...
I still have quite a ways to go...